It has been far too long since I’ve put into words how I’m feeling. The truth is, I’m still adjusting to this magical new world of motherhood and the delicate balance in finding time for myself. Time to be still with my thoughts or even just not think at all. It seems almost impossible at the moment but somehow it’s okay. I love this little man. I’m obsessed. I am staring down at him, asleep on my lap, and cannot fathom the amount of love I have for this being.
I’m typing with one hand, can barely feel my entire leftarm, my lower back is throbbing and I am dreaming about someone bringing me my water bottle that I can see on the counter. But I could sit like this forever.
The past 4 months have been a whirlwind; a beautiful whirlwind of incredible love and learning and patience and adjustment. I swear he is teaching me something new everyday. He has brought me the gift of presence. When I am with him, I put my phone down, computer off and give him my full and uninterrupted attention. (Although I do realize I am on my computer now, but he’s been asleep for 2 hours!) I think that this is the most important thing that you can give to a child. Whether you are with them all day or only see them for an hour, be there, with them in that moment. Don’t think about everything you need to get done or the things that went wrong during the day. Don’t just stare down at your phone scrolling through crap that is irrelevant; looking at other people’s lives while your own life is happening before your eyes.
BE HERE NOW. Make them know that they matter. It is the one thing that we all can do right now. It is the most important thing we can give, and it doesn’t cost a cent. So unplug. Shake off the day. Take some deep breaths. Clear your mind and give these beautiful beings what they crave the most. YOU.